Thursday, December 30, 2010

My New Year's Resolution for 2011

New Years Eve. Quite possibly the most over-rated holiday ever. I'm sorry, but there is very little that excites me enough to get me to stay up until midnight. ha! And the whole resolution thing? I typically don't give it a passing thought. If you want to lose weight, lose weight. If you want to quit smoking, quit smoking. You don't have to wait to January 1st to make a change in your life! COME ON PEOPLE! Can I get an Amen?

This year I decided to make a list though. I think you'll find it to be a bit nontraditional than what you'd usually see on a New Years Resolution List... but, let's be honest- would you expect a list from me to be normal in any sense? No, I doubt it. Let's begin.

Lauren's New Year's Resolutions for 2011!!!

1. Spend more money on shoes. I own 5 pairs of flip-flops, 1 pair of boots, 1 pair of sneakers, and maybe 3 pairs of dress shoes. That is not enough.
2. Bring 80's entertainment back into my life. I intend on watching 80's movies, television, and cartoons, listening to 80's music, wearing 80's clothes, and saying 80's phrases- pretty much all the time in 2011. I could not be more serious about this one. Totally far out!!
3. Exercise less, but be more active. Does that make sense? I have no intention of jogging more, or upping the intensity of my pilates workout. But perhaps I'll pick up rock-climbing, or dodge ball, or ice-hockey?
4. Start deleting people from my facebook page. I use facebook for sheer entertainment purposes and frankly, I'm getting a little tired of some people- all those in favor of blocking every single whiner, complainer, political radical, and creeper- say 'I'!
5. Eat more cheese. It's already the main staple of my diet- but I think there's always room for improvement.
6. Eat more period.
7. Keep on creating. This past year I've taken my rare free moments to create- I started my blog, been working on a book, writing a screenplay, and I intend to keep going as I get time! YES!
8. Invent new words. Yakinshmagle- noun. An annoying person who talks too much. That Lauren, she never shuts up! What a yakinshmagle!!!
9. Ride the Ferris Wheel with Hunter at least 1 time this year. The kid loves it and by george... it made me sick last year. There are these few moments when my age let's me know who's boss and I keep trying to argue it out of existence.

Lauren- "Hunter, Dylan- let's see how many rides we can go on before lunch!"
Lauren's age- "Don't do that. You'll get sick"
Lauren- "Shut up age. You don't own me!"
Lauren's age- "Yes I do. You're almost 30. If you ride too many rides you'll get nauseous and be miserable for the rest of the day."
Lauren- "Come on, I'm not "old". I used to go to parks and ride from open to close and never once get sick. I'll do what I want! You're not the boss of me!!"
Lauren's age- "Fine, suit yourself"
Literally 3 rides later, including the Ferris Wheel....
Lauren- "Ugh, Landon, I feel so sick. I'm gonna go sit down for a while..."

So yeah, I'm riding it again. We'll see who wins in the end.
10. Buying a pistol. Yes, I buying my own gun and maybe Landon and I will start going on dates to the shooting range. SIGH, we are sooo romantic <3!
11. Rewatching every episode of Lost.
12. Sending out real mail. I love getting a random letter in the mail and it NEVER happens anymore. I guess there is no point given email, facebook, blogging, etc, etc... But I think I want to start mailing again. We'll see. I'm not holding my breath on this one.
13. And finally... inventing a time machine. Don't laugh. It's not impossible.

I think that about covers things that I simply must resolve in 2011. I'm sure I missed a thing or two but shoot, I just don't know where I'd fine time to do anything else. It looks like I'll be pretty busy this upcoming year! In all seriousness I am really excited for this new year. I think it will be really awesome, and fun, and full of good things. I am SO looking forward to seeing all that God has for me, Landon, Hunter, and Dylan!

And so here is to you my fellow dudes and dudettes- Wishing you all a totally outrageous, totally far out, radical, jammin' 2011! May it be full of old episodes of Cheers, The Cosby Show, Golden Girls, ALF, Perfect Strangers, Full House, Bosom Buddies, and Family Ties. May it be full of classic movies like Planes, Trains, and Automobiles, Breakfast Club, Mannequin, Footloose, Goonies, Back to the Future, Ferris Buellers Day off, and Overboard. And when you hear a song by the Bangles, Culture Club, A-Ha, Wham!, REO Speedwagon, Journey, Styx or Whitesnake- you CRANK.IT.UP!

Have a totally gnarly New Year! Like, for sure!

Lauren

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Lauren's (!) True Holiday Story: A Christmas Tree.

Having two small children and two Christmas trees always makes for a good time...

The tree is usually put up while the children are
a.) sleeping
b.) playing in the other room or
c.) at grandma's

This year, they were home for it...


Then Hunter usually makes his way in to help decorate.



SIGH! Poor kid... Mommy is entirely too OCD to let the tree stay that way. I'll fix it.


So yes, tree is up and decorated, helping to add to the joy of the holiday season that has filled our home!

And then...











Enter Dylan....



Fantastic. Okay, so it's going on hour 8 decorating for Christmas... I'm getting a little tired...


There we go! Finished.



WHAT? WHAAAAAT???



Oh sweet Moses.....


Come on Moms, you know what I'm talking about...


And then...


Followed immediately by...


Crap.




.............




..............................................




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Well, if you can't beat 'em...


Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Please sit down. The Doctor will see you soon.

Since Dylan was born, I've made going to Dr.'s appointments an art form. All of Dyl's doctors but one are in Pittsburgh, so usually we have to drive 1.5 hours there, and then 1.5 hours back. What a long day that makes for. It's gotten so much better. We usually have a mess of appointments every 3 months instead of DAILY. Yes, when he was first born we we're going to Pittsburgh several times a week, then it went to once a week, then once every 2 weeks, then once a month, now we are at about every 3 months, and it's looking like beginning in January, we will only have appointments every 6 months!!! (Thank you Lord! Woo!!) So, all that to say- I know my way around a doctors' office...

Take a gander around next time you are in the waiting room. You wouldn't believe all the signs that are posted.
  • If you are more than 15 minutes late for your appointment, we will gladly reschedule you.
  • You must have your updated insurance cards with you at every appointment.
  • Co-pays are due on the same day as your appointment.
  • If you need to cancel your appointment, kindly gives us 24 hours notice.
  • There will be a $25 fee for all returned checks.
And those are just the basics for most offices. There are usually more specifically tailored signs to the particular kind of doctor you are visiting.

Well, let's take a little trip back a few weeks ago to Dylan's last appointment with the eye doctor. I always like to be a little early to appointments-- so we left early, drove 2 hours, got there 30 minutes early, and then proceeded to WAIT for 1.5 hours until we were even seen, then we have a 15 min consult, got his pupils dialated, and then had to wait another 20 minutes, then had another 20 minutes consult, then got back in the car and drove another 2 hours home. Let's tally the time: 6 hours 55 minutes.

Now, I know that it's not the Dr.'s fault that I live 2 hours away... but still, that is a very long day for a 2.5 year old. And I am very proud to say, Dylan was just perfect. He didn't even fuss. I tell you what, you will not find a more pleasant child than him. He is so good and just adapts to whatever. God blessed me, what can I say? But as I sat and waited and waited and waited and waited I looked at the signs and thought- why are these all about the Doctor??? Clearly we are here for a reason so why isn't anyone a little more considerate to what we're going through? Shouldn't it be about the patients? Is it fair that because THEY decide to book patients back to back and get behind that we have to wait for hours on end? No!! SO, I've decided to create some rules of my own and post signs on my back/purse/child as we walk into Doctor's appointments.



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